Saturday, January 21, 2006
arghh~ the sian sian feeling is back liao!!! its now 1pm and i juz woke up.. there's lots of thg i shld do.. but i'm juz so lazy.. and i wan to go out.. dun feel like staying home.. nth better to do.. no one is at home and i hav no game to play now.. no one is online to chat.. even hav.. i also abit no mood to chat.. haiz..
i dunno y i so sian lah~.. frm the time i recieved my pay.. i feel sian liao.. cuz i tot it would be $400.. but it became $280 ytd! 4 commission were nt paid.. 1 is cuz hse no cable point.. nv install.. den 2 of them is next month den get the pay.. den 1 more.. i dunno wth reason.. my dream of getting w900i is like broken.. i still owe ppl money.. i still needa buy lots thgs.. i already erase IPOD frm my wishlist liao...cuz i'm poor!
den wad else.. ppl are quiting MI liao.. few of them wanna withdraw liao.. den like tat only left me kc dan joel.. den when kc go back batam.. only left 3 of us liao.. so sian.. den sch also very sian.. now i keep skip sch.. i haven even hand in my profile tat paper..
ohya.. den i see those ppl in JC.. so envy them.. den i keep blame myself nv study liao.. see lah! i regret again liao!! i dowan same thg as PSLE to happen lor! arghhh~ but i also feel tat... jc quite stressful leh.. but i wan to be in it!!!! :(
den.. i now juz hav to control myself.. control the temptation around me... wanted to buy w900i when its $688.. but daniel and soem other ppl keep aksing me wait.. den no choice lor.. i wait lor! see how it drop price.. nv drop price den sian! den later the promo for the plan thgy no more liao i also sian!!! i'm scared.. cuz later i wait.. the feeling for w900i will slowly be gone.. den i will aim other hp liao... arghh~ i'm scare of it.. i dowan to buy it juz becuz i like it before and not now.. but nvm bah.. i am a poor guy.. i need to wait..
den see my fren.. he in tjc.... computing course.. den he juz signed for 10MBPS internet.. get a free N70 with free 2 years subscription.. den he also juz bought a new comp and the casing is the one i really wan... den now.. he saying he wanna buy PDA.. wah.. another big attack to my heart.. haiz.................. nvm.. money is difficult to earn.. i tolerate~~~!!!
now i will just live with the 8310 tat i borrowed frm him.. and wait.. wait bah... my ang bao money will get lesser and lesser... my high peak time also juz $200+.. but last year.. $100 plus only..
this year.. i think it will be less than $100.. i dunno y.. juz a feeling tat it will be like tat.. and now.. i really really dun feel the happiness for new year.. firstly.. my room is nt packed.. haha.. my fault i noe.. den.. not much new year stuffs bought.. and dun hav the atmosphere at all lor.. haiz.. felt so pain when i realise tat i nv help my mother clean the hse.. everythg rely on her.. haiz.... but i quite busy going out... den~.. i dunno wad excuse i can giv lah.. haiz...
den now.. my father retired liao.. however.. i dunno he go out everyday for wad.. but at least he came home very early compared to last time.. and he seems so tired.. he nv slp on the sofa when watching tv one.. but these few days.. 9+ only he feel tired and slp on the sofa liao.. haiz.. i'm so scared.. den now i heard my grandma is in hospital.. den i dunno other details liao.. haiz.....~ i'm still young ahh~ no one to depend on if anythg happen.. no one to guide me....
den few days ago.. saw my neighbour had a real big renovation.. change this change tat.. change to plasma tv.. change nice sofa change fridge.. waaa.. so rich.. while my tv keep having some prob for few years liao.. my father also dun intend to change.. i think we really had to save money liao.. and i will try to stop myself frm spending too much!!
i dun really hav the feeling to go sch.. i noe i shld study.. so.. if i go jc.. it will be easier for me.. but den.. i hav little confidence tat i can go jc.. nt cursing myself.. but its juz my inner heart feeling.. i'm now in holiday mood.. really holiday.. and in my dreams.. i wish i'm in a senerio like.. the whole hse no one.. parents go out.. only me at home.. and its rainning outside.. i'm in my room and on the speaker loud loud.. wah.. this is shiok.. but i will be sian cuz i will den hav nth to do...
ahhhh~~ shit lah! i dunno wad i'm toking.. juz ignore the whole thg!
pandaboo penned at 1/21/2006 01:20:00 pm
think free.live free
