Sunday, November 28, 2004
haiz.. i feel so weak.. very weak.. and i am already weak.. i dunno y.. i juz do thgs wif no strength.. haiz.. i dunno y.. its reaching dec..and i am still playing.. still in my own dreamland.. this 2 weeks.. my father went china for some business.. actually.. i also dunno wad he do there.. haiz.. and this 2 weeks.. i feel quite relax.. quite free.. and keep on playing.. play play and play.. i nv touched a pen since these 2 weeks.. all i touch was keyboard.. and mouse.. i keep playing.. going LAN gaming.. going movie.. and other activities such as roboGP and SVA plus the nco course.. all these kept me occupied.. and finally all these came to an end.. i still left wif one SVA competition.. which requires alot time.. for filming.. and video editing. tats a tough job for me.. cuz.. i dun really noe wad to do.. as i skipped alot of these sections last time due to my robotics and npcc course..
ok.. few more days.. and its december.. and today midnight. my father will be back.. december! means i left wif 1 month to finish wad i need to do.. including those stacks of hw and the plan of "changing for better".. i nv changed.. in anyway.. i never.. i really never.. and i nv intended to change during this period.. yah.. i dun really need a whole year or month to change... i may juz need a min.. or even a second..a moment to change myself..*tats wad natalia say to me*.. and enlighten myself.. or wadever it is.. haiz.. but.. my this week.. is already packed.. although u may say i still hav time to do my hw at night.. but.. i juz cant force myself to do it.. i feel weak to hold the pen.. and i will nt be in the mood.. to do thg seriously like homework.. juz tml.. monday... in the early morning till evening abt 7pm.. will be filming.. for band concert rehearsal and SVA... tue.. i mixed up.. i forgot i hav already set wi daniel they all to go watch movie.. and i dint noe.. and the SVA filming was set on tue.. its my fault.. i hav to face the consequences.. gt scoldings frm both sides.. really in a very difficult position.. but.. SVA is more important.. so.. i go for the SVA lor.. cuz.. i dun wan scoldings frm mr beh again.. saying i always gt prob.. and i dowan to call each member to change the date.. so.. i juz hav to sacriface.. movie.. find one day.. i go watch it myself..
last week.. went watching movie.. some sort of alone.. my fren wanted to watch the incredibles.. and me wanted shark tale.. so.. we went watching different movie at the same time.. hmm.. tats great.. i find nth wrong watching alone.. cuz its in the morning.. and shark tale is a long ago movie. tats y lesser ppl.. and.. its quite ok.. so.. i will find some morning.. and watch the incredibles(which set on tue to watch but i cant) and polar express.. alone... haiz..
my room.. or even my hse.. is as messy as before.. i remembered i promise to tidy up my hse.. but i cant.. i juz hav to much stuffs.. especially books.. all my cabinets or wadsoever u called it.. is already 100% full.. so.. i put the books on my table.. and my table looks very very very messy.. and i always get scoldings.. i tried to tidy it up.. i put some old sec 3 books away on the floor.. and also gt scoldings.. i really dunno wad to do! if my father was here.. he will ask me throw away.. but all is needed! how to throw!.. i really dunno.. i'm confused.. i'm stuck.. tats y.. i prefer to go out.. for abt 3 times.. i went for LAN gaming.. abt 5hours playing of games.. especially generals.. i dunno y.. i like the game very much.. and i bought the original cd at $69.90 and i'm now broke.. ohya.. i also bought the mp3 player.. and all tat.. wow.. i spend alot this holiday..
and.. i managed to 'remove' my ps2.. i gave it to my sister.. at least i dun hav to worry on the price to sell it.. hmm.. at least still can get some funds frm my father.. hehe...ohya.. PS2. i lend my frens a few games.. i asked him to return to me last week.. and he nv! i think he expected me to go his hse and get frm him! siao! my games! i lend him! it shld be he come my hse and return! omg.. i dun wanna get used.. or get bullied lik tat again.. i feel tat i really quite soft hearted.. always.. borrow thgs and ask ppl return thgs.. i still muz go there and collect... if i let my parents noe.. they sure scold me.. haiz.. now i really muz act "dao" liao..
haiz.. ohya.. say till tuesday.. and wed.. going for dental.. this time shld be bracing.. but i heard they say.. if my jaws the bone nv recover.. den cannot brace.. den.. till now haven recover leh! how sia.. muz drag the time again.. shit lar.. sad thg.. thur... i remembered i got somethg.. but forgot wad is it.. haiz. and fri and sat onwards.. i shld be free.. unless mr beh ask me go back sch to edit.. which is possible.. haiz.. the dateline for the submittion is 15th dec.. very very near.. and i am having stress!!!! very stressful again.. juz hping to find someone who is willing to spend $10 for LAN gaming this saturday.. haiz.. sad case..
i dunno when i can really 'change' and became my dream me.. which is.. very hardworking.. finish all hw.. and do thgs very fast.. improve alot.. all tat.. and all i wan is get straight As for o lvl.. i noe i cant for my bio.. cuz.. i hate bio experiment.. heard this year experiment was on prawns... still living one..eeekk.. arghh!! y i so weak! really no energy to do those thgs.. felt tat doing hw requires alot more energy than to play.. haha..
ok la.. mayb tats all.. i really dunno wad to say liao.. really tired liao.. cya.. gd luck everyone!
pandaboo penned at 11/28/2004 04:03:00 pm
think free.live free
